Tuesday, August 9, 2011

He won’t let me go, so he must love me right??

man begging woman not to leave him
I have heard this so many times from women who come to me for advice. In the midst of battling the reasons whether they should stay in their relationship or if it is time to walk away, they find comfort in believing that the man must love them because he refuses to bow out peacefully. Granted, there are many situations that the man is truly in love with the woman, but do not be fooled. A lot of times what has really happened is that you’re just too damn convenient and beneficial for this man to dare let you walk away. We all see women everyday who basically are the mothers to the men they are with, except sexual benefits are included. They take care of everything, carry the financial burden, and allow the man to get away with way too much. He can cheat on her, disrespect her and break her mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Yet, because he insists that he wants to be with you when you’re ready to leave you actually allow yourself to believe “he loves you”. If he really loved you, he wouldn’t do half the things, I just listed. He wouldn’t wait until you’re ready to leave to finally step up his game, because his heart would weigh heavy on him when he brought you to distress. A man who loves his woman cannot continuously watch his woman in pain and be ok with it. Some situations are not this extreme but the principle remains the same. He keeps you around and fights for you because you’re his meal ticket, and why let that go.

Love has nothing to do with it, and a woman needs to be honest with herself and not continue to feed herself a lie due to her fear of a failed relationship. At the end of the day I, nor does anyone else, have all the facts to your situation. So our opinions are somewhat limited. I do know somebody that does have all the facts, and that’s GOD. So when you’re in a situation where you really don’t know where you stand with your partner, lean on GOD’s guidance. Because believe me, that man can and will say whatever is necessary to keep his benefits going, but GOD will only tell you to do what is beneficial for YOU.


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